Posted in My Life Stories, Theatre, Uncategorized

Trick or Treat

It’s been a while since I last wrote this blog.

It’s been tricky that I love to write but I don’t like to read.

It’s also been a chapter or season in my life that is now closed.

I’ve met some fantastic people there.

I love doing it soo much that I gave it all – that I gave everything till I was just falling apart and drained out.

It’s also so weird that two nights before I was just saying things to God

‘God, I love this job. But I’m also drained out. I can’t work like this anymore. There’s a lot toxic people there now. I’ve did it all. I tried to deal with everything that I feel it’s still under the umbrella of me as a stage manager. I’ve put it all until it becomes too much.

I moved to my current apartment now because of this job. I love where I’m staying now actually.

I’m sorry that if You feel that I wasn’t thankful. But now, I can’t process anything.’

The company that I love working, that they’re saying loyalty, that they’re saying its not about itung2an, and somehow now we all have to follow specific procedures, and etc.

I got terminated, but they don’t want to fired me.

I got forcefully to resign and give them my resignation letter but turns out they already continue to want me out just before the show starts to roll on.

I went in today and it seems everything is okay.

Without me.

It was so bizarre that the night before I was saying the exact same words – and now it’s happening in front of me.

I am really tired, exhausted, drained. and I need a break.

I think God sees that.

Physically / mentally, I’m not okay for this.

I love my job, I love doing what I do – as a stage manager – and I didn’t get a chance to learn ! It’s ridiculous !

Everything about this it’s just silly.

Now, I don’t know what to do with my self anymore.

I know,

Again.

I should live in a cave.

In solitude.

Where I create my own world.

Without interruptions or trying to fit in for other people.

Why should I change my self while everybody its just caring of what their own problems. ??

or their own trick?

Author:

Jesus. #TreatPeopleWithKindness Head of Hospitality @FullColorParty Loves to Write I love concerts, and everything about music Loves to assist and help others I am always prepared for everything Loves to travel but I can't travel light - I've tried tho! :D Feel Free to chat me about things! I'm struggling with anxiety / dark thoughts / brain noise (as Chris Evans might said it :P) - sometimes :)

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